November 3, 2020
Joe Fairless

It’s About Who You Know and Holding Onto Those Relationships

A common saying is that it’s not what you know, but it’s who you know. Is this true? It is but only to a point. Plus, it’s important to consider how important who you know is to your personal life. Although that saying is generally referring to a business setting, who you know in your personal life, the people you spend time with, has a tremendous impact on the overall quality of your life.

Who you know: wealth building

One of the most significant factors in wealth building is the knowledge that you have leading into your monetary decisions. This is true for those who regularly engage in passive investing, and it is also true for people who focus on active investing. Regardless, you want to research what you are considering devoting money towards as efficiently as possible to ensure that the odds of receiving positive returns are as high as possible.

Of course, much of that research can be done without interacting with anybody else. However, that same research is often also readily available to others making similar investing decisions. What will set you apart is knowing people who can provide you with information that is not otherwise available. For example, if you are considering a real estate investment, someone you trust may have accurate reads on the person selling, on the area it is in and on what the future may hold for it.

Who you know can also end up improving your ability to interpret the information that you do come across. All of us can remember teachers that we have had who resonated with us. There was just something about their teaching style that clicked with how we learn. The same is true in investing. Knowing someone who can make investing-related information click for you is an invaluable resource to have.

Who you know: personal benefits

Who you have had in your life has had a tremendous impact on making you the person you are today. Of course, your family members may have had the most impact, but also impactful have been friends you have had, teachers who have taught you lessons and even the communities that you have been a part of. The latter point relates to places such as cities, universities and work organizations that you were a member of.

As far as societies go, a few commonly known examples of how communities influence who we become can be seen in Italians regularly gesticulating in getting their points across and Russians, for the most part, not smiling and even viewing those who do as less intelligent. Studies have also shown that, for example, those from northern Europe are generally more conscientious than their southern European counterparts.

Connected with that last point, parenting plays a pivotal role in shaping children’s’ minds. That is expected when you consider how much time many parents spend with their children. In fact, a distinct lack of time spent with their children has a profound effect as well. However, first, parents are themselves influenced by the societies that they were in before they pass on their adopted values and mindsets.

Your friends and relationship partners also shape who you are as a person. For example, being in a relationship or a close friendship with someone who sees you as the person you would like to be generally results in you happily becoming that person. Conversely, those in your life who view you as someone you do not want to become will have an adverse influence on who you become and on your state of mind.

Family members, friends and relationship partners also influence the types of things that we enjoy and the things that we do. This alters not only how we spend our time, but it also plays direct and indirect roles in how our wealth is used. Many of these influences can be subconscious in nature, meaning that you do not always realize that it is happening at the time that it is or even afterwards.

Holding onto those relationships

Now that you know how important these relationships are to both the business and personal sides of your life, you likely know what is coming next: the importance of holding onto those relationships. First, if someone is serving as a negative influence on your life, you will want to reduce their impact on it as much as can be done when taking the entire picture into consideration. But when you do find those who positively influence your life, it is important to ensure, when possible, that they remain a part of it.

Of course, we cannot ensure that every person in our lives will have a positive effect on us. However, we can ensure that those we surround ourselves with positively influence us as much as possible. In other words, focus on what you can control, and do your best to keep people around you who embody that positivity and productivity. Do the same for specific traits that you would like to maintain or increase in your life, such as confidence, healthiness, peacefulness, being driven and being content. Keep the people in your life who you want rubbing off on you.

One of the best ways to hold onto these relationships is to be giving yourself. Consider how you are influencing others. Are you somebody who positively influences others, both in general as well as those who are influencing you in ways that you would like them to? If you are someone who they would like to keep in their lives, it will be much easier for you to keep them in yours.

Cultivating those relationships

Not only should you make sure to hold onto these valuable relationships, but you should also continuously improve the cumulative effect that others are having on your life. One of the best ways to do this is by continuing to meet people. That will generally result in positive effects in your life that are related to both the business side of it – i.e. real estate, passive investing, generational wealth, etc. – as well as the personal aspects of it.

One way to do this is by attending events that are of interest to you. Not only will the event itself engage your mind, but you will also meet a number of like-minded people while there. That is just as true of a real estate convention as it is of an NFL game or a Taylor Swift concert. In addition to the personal benefits of being with people who share your interests, you may also discover ways to use your wealth that will improve aspects of your life that are important to you – e.g. devoting funds to an arena.

The internet is also a great means for meeting the type of people who you want influencing your life. If you would like to meet those who are experts in growing generational wealth so that you can become more knowledgeable about it, search online for them. You can also do the same as it relates to inspirational people and to those who share your interests.

Also, make sure to keep in mind who you are following on social networking websites such as Facebook and Twitter. The words that you read influence who you are and who you become. Yes, for the most part, we can ignore trolls, but also ensure that you limit the messages that you come across that are not going to help you get to where you want to be emotionally or financially.

Also consider the books that you are reading. Those authors are people influencing you as well, and you may or may not want to keep them as a part of your life.

Note that you may also be surprised at who turns out to be an especially positive influence. Think about relationship partners and friends you have had. In some cases, their impact on your life unexpectedly evolved from initially being negligible, that of acquaintances, for example, to them turning into some of the most important people in your life.

Do not overvalue the importance of who you know

As important as who you know is to our lives, it is also essential to not overvalue that importance. From a work perspective, having connections that will increase the chances that you will receive that interview or even that coveted position is great. However, your long-term success will be based just as much on your ability to do that job that you have been offered.

You should also consider that your aptitude at that position that you received will go a long ways towards causing those you know, those who helped you get it, to continue to speak positively about you to others who can also help you reach the places that you want to reach. As a result, do place a tremendous amount of emphasis on your aptitude for the task as well as who you surround yourself with.            

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this blog post are provided for informational purposes only, and should not be construed as an offer to buy or sell any securities or to make or consider any investment or course of action.

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