3 Negotiating Tips Used Against Me

I’ve been involved in many negotiations throughout my career – both in real estate and just general full-time job circumstances. Here are three negotiating tactics that were used against me and worked. Only thing I ask is that you please use the following info for good not evil.

They are so damn likable.

Problem: Do you find it’s tough to negotiate against someone you really like? Boy, I do. It can be awkward at first. Maybe you don’t want to offend them but there’s some serious business that needs to be addressed.

Solution: Stick to the facts. Facts are emotionless. The facts do not have trigger phrases like “this is unacceptable” or “but it’s not fair” or “but I’ve worked really hard on this” or “but I’ve been here so long” or curse words like…well, you know.

When you’re a calculated surgeon at the negotiating table sticking only to the facts – your stance can’t (logically) be disputed.

They demonstrate they have more knowledge on topic than you (and gray hair helps)

Problem: They have more experience in the industry, more knowledge about the topic and are older. And, when they talk it’s clear they know more about the topic than you do. Quadruple wammy.

Solution: First, align yourself with people who can have all the things you’re lacking. Then bring them in to actively participate with you. If that’s not possible, don’t worry because here’s a technique to use regardless of if you have seasoned backup.

Another solution: Think like a lawyer. The opposition might throw a lot at you and, quite frankly, say stuff you don’t understand. Dismiss the irrelevant information (stuff they say to demonstrate their expertise but isn’t relevant to your outcome) and only focus on the outcome. I like to think of me going 1000 mph and all the stuff they are saying are the blurry objects  They might say a lot of stuff but only focus on the info that will get you to your outcome. It’s one heck of an exercise in concentration but it works really well once you master it.

They devalue your contribution (ex. payment, time, thoughts)

Problem: “For that price I’m basically losing money on this deal,” says the seller to the buyer. But then the deal goes through and somehow they stay in business and are happy with the transaction. Has that happened to you before? It’s happened to me many times.

Solution: Create a list of 5 reasons why the seller should do the deal. This helps you understand from their perspective why it is favorable. You can choose to bring up those points or just keep them in your head – regardless, once you have that list you’ll remind yourself of the value you’re bringing to the table. They wouldn’t be having this conversation with you if they didn’t agree you do bring value. Whether it’s money or time, you are adding tremendous value to this arrangement, and don’t let them tell you otherwise.

What are some negotiating tactics that you’ve seen work?